Sunday, 25 September 2016
Saturday, 24 September 2016
Friday, 23 September 2016
Z105
A girl asks her father, "Dad, there is something that my boyfriend said to me today, that I didn't understand. He said that I have a beautiful chassis, lovely headlamps, soft looking airbags and a fantastic bumper!" Dad quickly answered and said, ''Listen carefully girl, and go tell your fucken weed smoker stupid boyfriend that if he dares opens your bonnet and tries to check your oil with his dip-stick, I will violently pull down his crankshaft and tighten his nuts so hard with a bobjaan until his ball-bearings pop out of their sockets and he will start leaking oil and other fluids out of his rear exhaust pipe!!!!
Z104
😂Regai Timboseka nhasi😂😂😂😂
Panga panemuwe murume🚶anga akadhakwa akati regai ndimbopinda mu FAMAS 🏥ndokuti nhai mungaitewo macodom here paside pake panga panaamai 🙎vakashamisika ndokuti kunemurume nhai Mukuwasha mashayawo here word rakarerukawo here chidhakwa chiya 🚶chakavhura zipi ndokuisa chnhu chake pachena zvikanzi nhai mungaitewo hembe inokwana mwana uyu 🙍
👆👆👆👆 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😀😃😄😅😆
Thursday, 25 August 2016
The Jokes People Love Like Anything
Billions of people around there in the world and each one of them search for a moment to have a good laughter to reduce the stress. Although this blog is full of amazing jokes but this short post gonna give a the incredible funny jokes people love to hear on this earth so enjoy..
Here you go:
What is the difference between senior and junior?
The person who lives near sea is senior and who lives near zoo in junior.
Wife: See our neighbour.. He takes his wife everyday outside for dinner, did you ever thing of doing it?
Husband: I tried asking his wife many times but she refuses always :)
Height of insult:
In the hot summer, lot of people were waiting for bus..
Beggar comes and get some tips from everybody..then he takes his smartphone, books a cab and rides away!
I got impressed when someone's laugh is funnier then his jokes.
I am not short, I am built close to the earth for speed and accuracy.
Him: Did you ever do any noble cause?
Me: Yes, somebody was having pain in their leg, waking very slowly..then I opened my dog and they reached in 2 minutes.
My Boss wishes me to have a good and happy day.
So I returned to home.
Press any key to start..
Where is 'Any' key?
Never laugh on your spouse's choice..
You are one of them.
Admit It:
You push the door when it say pull..
The awkward moment when you think you are going to do a silent fart and it comes out like a machine gun.
The more you weigh..the harder you are to kidnap so stay safe and eat cakes.
Makes us crazy to re-think those weird conversations with your fast friend and thinking if someone heard us right now, we'd put into mental hospital.
I love my pillow because it gives me different hairstyle everyday!
Here you go:
What is the difference between senior and junior?
The person who lives near sea is senior and who lives near zoo in junior.
Wife: See our neighbour.. He takes his wife everyday outside for dinner, did you ever thing of doing it?
Husband: I tried asking his wife many times but she refuses always :)
Height of insult:
In the hot summer, lot of people were waiting for bus..
Beggar comes and get some tips from everybody..then he takes his smartphone, books a cab and rides away!
I got impressed when someone's laugh is funnier then his jokes.
I am not short, I am built close to the earth for speed and accuracy.
Him: Did you ever do any noble cause?
Me: Yes, somebody was having pain in their leg, waking very slowly..then I opened my dog and they reached in 2 minutes.
My Boss wishes me to have a good and happy day.
So I returned to home.
Press any key to start..
Where is 'Any' key?
Never laugh on your spouse's choice..
You are one of them.
Admit It:
You push the door when it say pull..
The awkward moment when you think you are going to do a silent fart and it comes out like a machine gun.
The more you weigh..the harder you are to kidnap so stay safe and eat cakes.
Makes us crazy to re-think those weird conversations with your fast friend and thinking if someone heard us right now, we'd put into mental hospital.
I love my pillow because it gives me different hairstyle everyday!
Friday, 20 May 2016
How to Make Somebody Laugh/Happy
Do you do your best to make your friends, relatives or anybody laugh but without success? If yes, you must learn/use the right tactics to let make it happen. To make your intention into reality, you must learn the mandatory steps.
So here we are sharing those important steps to let you learn this:
Step 1: Mood
If you are in good mood doesn't mean that the other person is also in the same mood. You should learn or sense their mood to successfully make them laugh. Don't forget the rule of "Right thing at right time". So if you say joke when they are in normal mood, you will be thorough.
Step 2: Conversation:
To make the other person happy, you must start conversation slowly and make open ended questions so that they can also involve. And the moment, they go familiar, you play your jokes to make them laughing.
Step 3: Interest:
If I love swimming and you talk about how dangerous the water it. I may contradict. So to make anybody smiling, you must know their interest and talk accordingly. The right flow and the right way of talk will help you win their interest which will lead to loads of laugh.
Step 4: Material:
Do you have enough material in your talks/mind to drag anybody's attention. This comes with homework to fill lots of talking material. When you have much topis and gossips in your mind, you will not let the silent overtake you. Bear this in your mind.
Step 5: Timing
The above mention quality is very much needed to have fun and let other involve. When you say right thing taking care of timing, I bet they can not stop their laughter at all. This is what comedians are known for. So whether it is you, stand up comedians or actors - timing is much important.
That is it and you are done. Rest is withing yourself. I appreciate you intention because making anybody cry is very easy but the tough task is to make somebody smiling. Your good task will leave you mark in everybody's heart and they will never ever forget you. When they smile because of you, you get a special feeling and satisfaction. Your sense of humor will be appreciated and your polite way and good communication skill gonna work well.
Stay tuned for more enjoyable coming on way. Wish you a very good life and great journey.
So here we are sharing those important steps to let you learn this:
Step 1: Mood
If you are in good mood doesn't mean that the other person is also in the same mood. You should learn or sense their mood to successfully make them laugh. Don't forget the rule of "Right thing at right time". So if you say joke when they are in normal mood, you will be thorough.
Step 2: Conversation:
To make the other person happy, you must start conversation slowly and make open ended questions so that they can also involve. And the moment, they go familiar, you play your jokes to make them laughing.
Step 3: Interest:
If I love swimming and you talk about how dangerous the water it. I may contradict. So to make anybody smiling, you must know their interest and talk accordingly. The right flow and the right way of talk will help you win their interest which will lead to loads of laugh.
Step 4: Material:
Do you have enough material in your talks/mind to drag anybody's attention. This comes with homework to fill lots of talking material. When you have much topis and gossips in your mind, you will not let the silent overtake you. Bear this in your mind.
Step 5: Timing
The above mention quality is very much needed to have fun and let other involve. When you say right thing taking care of timing, I bet they can not stop their laughter at all. This is what comedians are known for. So whether it is you, stand up comedians or actors - timing is much important.
That is it and you are done. Rest is withing yourself. I appreciate you intention because making anybody cry is very easy but the tough task is to make somebody smiling. Your good task will leave you mark in everybody's heart and they will never ever forget you. When they smile because of you, you get a special feeling and satisfaction. Your sense of humor will be appreciated and your polite way and good communication skill gonna work well.
Stay tuned for more enjoyable coming on way. Wish you a very good life and great journey.
Tuesday, 3 May 2016
11 Jokes You Must Share Once in Short Life
Life is small and it flies like dust from fist so to make maximum out of it, here are awesome collection of 11 funny jokes a human being must share/read/hear in life. It gonna give you/your listener an amazing sense of humor with big fountain of laughter.
Here we go:
Husband: I seems like you put excess salt in vegetables.
Wife: Please, salt is accurate, vegetables are less. I told you to bring sufficient quantity.
Moral: Wife is always right!
I am not short..
I am built close to the ground for speed and accuracy.
Helmet and wife are similar:
Your life is saved as long as you keep them on your head!:)
Why they keep gap between engagement and marriage?
Because you can not blame that you have not given a chance to escape!!
H.O.M.E.W.O.R.K.
Half of my energy wasted on random knowledge..
I shared a chemistry joke..
But..
There was no Reaction!
Why did Adele crossed the road?
To say hello from other side.
In marriage: Bride's X-boyfriend also came..
Father: Who are you?
X: I am out after playing semi final.. Now here to see the final!
What do you call fake noodle?
an impasta!
Guess, who I saw today?
Who?
Everybody I looked at! :))
I miss you like an Idiot misses the point!
That is it. Thirst for more? You are welcome to read come here often read our the refreshing stuff.
Husband: I seems like you put excess salt in vegetables.
Wife: Please, salt is accurate, vegetables are less. I told you to bring sufficient quantity.
Moral: Wife is always right!
I am not short..
I am built close to the ground for speed and accuracy.
Helmet and wife are similar:
Your life is saved as long as you keep them on your head!:)
Why they keep gap between engagement and marriage?
Because you can not blame that you have not given a chance to escape!!
H.O.M.E.W.O.R.K.
Half of my energy wasted on random knowledge..
I shared a chemistry joke..
But..
There was no Reaction!
Why did Adele crossed the road?
To say hello from other side.
In marriage: Bride's X-boyfriend also came..
Father: Who are you?
X: I am out after playing semi final.. Now here to see the final!
What do you call fake noodle?
an impasta!
Guess, who I saw today?
Who?
Everybody I looked at! :))
I miss you like an Idiot misses the point!
That is it. Thirst for more? You are welcome to read come here often read our the refreshing stuff.
Sunday, 6 March 2016
Jokes - Let the Life Enjoy
Laugh a lot, keep having fun and Enjoy - these lines are the most listened lines in life. Ever you wonder why:
people keep saying this?
The simple answer is..
'Life is being given to enjoy, laugh and live at fullest'
Yes, if we are live on this earth, we must laugh because:
Laughter is best medicine
and
It keeps lots of problems away from us.
It also makes us strong and likable.
So now the question is how to do it or how to have it?
Well, there are many ways to have it i.e.
reading and sharing Jokes,
Entertainment shows on television,
Playing with kids and
Doing what you love.
Among all the above ways, my favorite one is Sharing Jokes.So let me share some new good funny most interesting jokes to opens up your mood and to give you opportunity to give to big laugh:
1. How do you make group of lawyer smile in a pic?
Say feeeeees!
2. A dude is sitting at a bar, wearing a fancy new watch, covered with buttons and lights and dials. The girl next to him says, "Wow, that's a really amazing watch.""Thanks," says the guy, "It has got amazing technology. I can telepathically ask this watch anything I want to know, and it'll answer me, telepathically.""Rubbish," says the girl."No, it's true," says that guy. "Look, tell you what, I'll prove it. I'll ask it if you've got any panties on."The guy scrunches up his eyes for a moment, as if concentrating hard to talk to his watch, then opens them and says, "Nope, it says you haven't got any panties on.""Well, it's wrong," says the girl, "I do have panties on.""Damn," says the guy, slapping his watch, "it is an hour fast!"
3. Today evening, I was badly slapped by a busty woman in an elevator.
I was staring at her breasts when she said, "would you please press one?"
So I did.
I don't remember much after that...
I know 3 are not enough and you want to read/search more. See, how badly your heart and mind needs them. This was just an example. The more you read, the more you would like to read! In a short, each part of our body needs the exercise of smile so do not keep yourself awaited.
people keep saying this?
The simple answer is..
'Life is being given to enjoy, laugh and live at fullest'
Yes, if we are live on this earth, we must laugh because:
Laughter is best medicine
and
It keeps lots of problems away from us.
It also makes us strong and likable.
So now the question is how to do it or how to have it?
Well, there are many ways to have it i.e.
reading and sharing Jokes,
Entertainment shows on television,
Playing with kids and
Doing what you love.
Among all the above ways, my favorite one is Sharing Jokes.So let me share some new good funny most interesting jokes to opens up your mood and to give you opportunity to give to big laugh:
1. How do you make group of lawyer smile in a pic?
Say feeeeees!
2. A dude is sitting at a bar, wearing a fancy new watch, covered with buttons and lights and dials. The girl next to him says, "Wow, that's a really amazing watch.""Thanks," says the guy, "It has got amazing technology. I can telepathically ask this watch anything I want to know, and it'll answer me, telepathically.""Rubbish," says the girl."No, it's true," says that guy. "Look, tell you what, I'll prove it. I'll ask it if you've got any panties on."The guy scrunches up his eyes for a moment, as if concentrating hard to talk to his watch, then opens them and says, "Nope, it says you haven't got any panties on.""Well, it's wrong," says the girl, "I do have panties on.""Damn," says the guy, slapping his watch, "it is an hour fast!"
3. Today evening, I was badly slapped by a busty woman in an elevator.
I was staring at her breasts when she said, "would you please press one?"
So I did.
I don't remember much after that...
I know 3 are not enough and you want to read/search more. See, how badly your heart and mind needs them. This was just an example. The more you read, the more you would like to read! In a short, each part of our body needs the exercise of smile so do not keep yourself awaited.
Saturday, 5 March 2016
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Friday, 4 March 2016
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Friday, 5 February 2016
Share these Jokes for making your day wonderful
Once a scientific just got married just to understand what is marriage!
Now he is not getting understand - what is science!
Wife: Please share those 3 magical word..
Husband: I Love you?
Wife: No
Husband: I Like You
Wife: No
Husband: I Miss You
Wife: No
Husband: It my mistake!
Wife: So nice of you :)
One man keeps on eating in marriage:
The other man asks: Til when you continue eating?
Man: I am also wondering but in invitation, it was written: Dinner 7 to 11 pm!
Boy to girl: Ashamed, you are a girl and drink alcohol?
Girl: So what do you expect? Should I change my gender for this?
In past years, people who leave and sacrifice their everything known as priest.
But now they are know as 'Online'
Now he is not getting understand - what is science!
Wife: Please share those 3 magical word..
Husband: I Love you?
Wife: No
Husband: I Like You
Wife: No
Husband: I Miss You
Wife: No
Husband: It my mistake!
Wife: So nice of you :)
One man keeps on eating in marriage:
The other man asks: Til when you continue eating?
Man: I am also wondering but in invitation, it was written: Dinner 7 to 11 pm!
Boy to girl: Ashamed, you are a girl and drink alcohol?
Girl: So what do you expect? Should I change my gender for this?
In past years, people who leave and sacrifice their everything known as priest.
But now they are know as 'Online'
Sunday, 10 January 2016
Best Jokes for 2016
Welcome in new year 2016 and we must welcome it with loads of smile which can be sourced from our best jokes here. This whole year and all 12 months, we wish and hope that you keep on laughing and enjoying. May your life be filled with lots of enjoyable moments. Our jokes section is little efforts of doing so! Enjoy..
Girl to his lover: Today my brother saw me with you on your bike!
Boy: OMG, Now what?
Girl: They took my travel money back! You know my family is very strict.
What happens when an egg laughs?
It cracks up!
Girls only calls me ugly until they find out how much money I make....
Then they call me ugly and poor...
What is green, fuzzy and if it is fell out of tree, it can break your head!
Pool table..
The thief broke into my house last night.. They started searching for money so I wake I joined them in search!
If olive oil is made of olives then baby oil is made of ....
Thant crazy moment when you can't finish a line because you are laughing so hard about ending!
Every family has a weird relative.. if you don't know who it is..probable=y it is you..
Stop.. you are under a rest!
Every time I plan to eat something better, I hear my stomach laughing.
Men to the left because women are always right!
My boss told me: Have a good day!
So I I went home!
Me? Mature... Haha . I still laugh when the ketchup bottle farts!
If they don't want sarcastic answer then don't ask for stupid questions.
Unless life also hands you sugar and water, your lemonade is always going to suck.
I think I want a job of cleaning mirror..because it is something I see myself doing!
She said -
Books or Me?"
I still remember her sometimes when I buy a book!
Girl to his lover: Today my brother saw me with you on your bike!
Boy: OMG, Now what?
Girl: They took my travel money back! You know my family is very strict.
What happens when an egg laughs?
It cracks up!
Girls only calls me ugly until they find out how much money I make....
Then they call me ugly and poor...
What is green, fuzzy and if it is fell out of tree, it can break your head!
Pool table..
The thief broke into my house last night.. They started searching for money so I wake I joined them in search!
If olive oil is made of olives then baby oil is made of ....
Thant crazy moment when you can't finish a line because you are laughing so hard about ending!
Every family has a weird relative.. if you don't know who it is..probable=y it is you..
Stop.. you are under a rest!
Every time I plan to eat something better, I hear my stomach laughing.
Men to the left because women are always right!
My boss told me: Have a good day!
So I I went home!
Me? Mature... Haha . I still laugh when the ketchup bottle farts!
If they don't want sarcastic answer then don't ask for stupid questions.
Unless life also hands you sugar and water, your lemonade is always going to suck.
I think I want a job of cleaning mirror..because it is something I see myself doing!
She said -
Books or Me?"
I still remember her sometimes when I buy a book!
Wednesday, 16 December 2015
New New Jokes
Here we come again with new new jokes to let you smile more, enjoy more and share more laughter for good day and goo life.
Wife joins English speaking class and after few days:
Wife to husband: Welcome home darling.
Husband: Thank you, but I am so tired today.
Wife: Ok, No probs, 'REST IN PEACE' :(
In marriage, no matters how many VIP comes..
The most important person is who owns the Key of car in which alcohol is stored.
Welding and wedding - what s ye difference between both?
In welding, first it sparks than things stick forever
but
In marriage, it is opposite. Here first you stick than lifetime it sparks.. :)
When there is no trust in relationship and no internet in smartphone....than...
people start playing Games..
Friend, please tell me - a good girl to marry.
Yes, i know a girl of B Com
Don worry about COM, but she must be married and smart!
Mom: Tomorrow, girl side people are coming to final
Boy: Mom, but our thinking is not matching..
Mom: So what, even our thinking is not matched with you, but still you are with us from last 30 years!!
Your feeling and confusion when guest offer you some money and your parents stop you!
Don't try to understand women.
Only women can understand women and...
they hate each others.
Mother: What should I do. Wherever I keep my money, my son steals. I am clueless.!
Me: Idea, Just keep it safe in his books. e never touches them.
How to make your wife satisfy & happy . . . .!
Do you think it is difficult, not really, but you just need to be:
1. a friend
2. a father
3. a man
4. a chef
5. an electrician
6. a companion
7. a lover
8. a brother
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a psychiatrist
13. a healer
14. a good listener
15. an organizer
16. a good father
17. Tolerant
18. Prudent
19. Ambitious
20. Capable
21. Courageous
22. Determined
23. True
24. Dependable
25. Passionate
26. Compassionate
27. Very clean
28. a decorator
29. a stylist
30. a charmer
31. a gynecologist
32. a psychologist
33. a bug exterminator
34. Sympathetic
35. Athletic
36. Warm
37. Attentive
38. Gallant
39. Intelligent
40. Funny
41. Creative
42. Tender
43. Strong
44. Understanding
AND, WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. Give her compliments frequently
46. Love shopping
47. Be honest
48. Be very rich
49. Never stress her
50. Never look at other women!
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. Give her lots of space
AND, VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* her favorite color
* her favorite flower
* her favorite gem
* her favorite fragrance
* her favorite memories
* her favorite holidays
* her favorite friends
* her favorite vacation destinations
* her favorite beverage
* her favorite food
* her favorite restaurant
* any arrangements she makes
---------------------
And Now,
HOW TO MAKE HUSBAND HAPPY
Just leave him alone or with his friends.....with his TV remote and mobile phone...and his favourite drink.....And he'll be happiest person on the earth..
A Mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl roommate.
During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between him and his roommate than met the eye.
Reading his mom's thoughts, the son volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, we are just roommates."
About a week later, his roommate came to him saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver plate. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"
He said ,"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure."
He sat down and wrote :
Dear Mother:
I'm not saying that you 'did' take the silver plate from my house, I'm not saying that you 'did not' take the silver plate .. But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love,
Your son
Several days later, he received an email from his Mother which read:
Dear Son:
I'm not saying that you DO sleep with your roommate, and I'm not saying that you DO NOT sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the silver plate by now, under the pillow�
Love,
Mom
Wife joins English speaking class and after few days:
Wife to husband: Welcome home darling.
Husband: Thank you, but I am so tired today.
Wife: Ok, No probs, 'REST IN PEACE' :(
In marriage, no matters how many VIP comes..
The most important person is who owns the Key of car in which alcohol is stored.
Welding and wedding - what s ye difference between both?
In welding, first it sparks than things stick forever
but
In marriage, it is opposite. Here first you stick than lifetime it sparks.. :)
When there is no trust in relationship and no internet in smartphone....than...
people start playing Games..
Friend, please tell me - a good girl to marry.
Yes, i know a girl of B Com
Don worry about COM, but she must be married and smart!
Mom: Tomorrow, girl side people are coming to final
Boy: Mom, but our thinking is not matching..
Mom: So what, even our thinking is not matched with you, but still you are with us from last 30 years!!
Your feeling and confusion when guest offer you some money and your parents stop you!
Don't try to understand women.
Only women can understand women and...
they hate each others.
Mother: What should I do. Wherever I keep my money, my son steals. I am clueless.!
Me: Idea, Just keep it safe in his books. e never touches them.
How to make your wife satisfy & happy . . . .!
Do you think it is difficult, not really, but you just need to be:
1. a friend
2. a father
3. a man
4. a chef
5. an electrician
6. a companion
7. a lover
8. a brother
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a psychiatrist
13. a healer
14. a good listener
15. an organizer
16. a good father
17. Tolerant
18. Prudent
19. Ambitious
20. Capable
21. Courageous
22. Determined
23. True
24. Dependable
25. Passionate
26. Compassionate
27. Very clean
28. a decorator
29. a stylist
30. a charmer
31. a gynecologist
32. a psychologist
33. a bug exterminator
34. Sympathetic
35. Athletic
36. Warm
37. Attentive
38. Gallant
39. Intelligent
40. Funny
41. Creative
42. Tender
43. Strong
44. Understanding
AND, WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. Give her compliments frequently
46. Love shopping
47. Be honest
48. Be very rich
49. Never stress her
50. Never look at other women!
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. Give her lots of space
AND, VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* her favorite color
* her favorite flower
* her favorite gem
* her favorite fragrance
* her favorite memories
* her favorite holidays
* her favorite friends
* her favorite vacation destinations
* her favorite beverage
* her favorite food
* her favorite restaurant
* any arrangements she makes
---------------------
And Now,
HOW TO MAKE HUSBAND HAPPY
Just leave him alone or with his friends.....with his TV remote and mobile phone...and his favourite drink.....And he'll be happiest person on the earth..
A Mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl roommate.
During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between him and his roommate than met the eye.
Reading his mom's thoughts, the son volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, we are just roommates."
About a week later, his roommate came to him saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver plate. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"
He said ,"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure."
He sat down and wrote :
Dear Mother:
I'm not saying that you 'did' take the silver plate from my house, I'm not saying that you 'did not' take the silver plate .. But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love,
Your son
Several days later, he received an email from his Mother which read:
Dear Son:
I'm not saying that you DO sleep with your roommate, and I'm not saying that you DO NOT sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the silver plate by now, under the pillow�
Love,
Mom
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