Jokes and Funny Lines You Can't Afford to Miss

Often, in the tight schedule of daily, we skip the laughter but it is not good. SO here we come with good jokes to be read in short time. So enjoy and spread. Hurray!


I was on the subway, sitting on a newspaper, and a guy comes over and asks �Are you reading that?" I didn�t know what to say. So I said yes. I stood up, turned the page, and sat down again. (David Brenner).


These impossible women! How do they get around us! The poet was right: can�t live with them, or without them! (Aristophanes)


I went to the psychiatrist, and he says "You're crazy " I tell him I want a second opinion. He says, �Okay, you're ugly too!" (Rodney Dangerfield)

My sister was with two men in one night. She could hardly walk after that. Can you imagine? Two dinners! (Sarah Silverman)

A comedian is sitting at the bar of a comedy club late one night when a beautiuful woman comes up to him and says "I saw you perform tonight, and you�re the funniest guy I�ve ever seen. I want to take you home and give you the hottest night you�re ever had." The comedian looks at her and says, "Did you see the first show or the second show?"

How are women and tornadoes alike?
They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.

There was a guy who was struggling to decide what to wear to go to a fancy costume party... Then he had a bright idea. When the host answered the door, he found the guy standing there with no shirt and no socks on. "What the hell are you supposed to be?" asked the host. "A premature ejaculation," said the man. "I just came in my pants!"

9 Super Light Jokes

Life is all about laughing as much as possible, but you must need a reason to have a good laugh! Don't worry, here are top 9 light hilarious funny jokes to help in doing it. Do share them further to continue the wave of fun keep surrounding the world!

1. Wife: I can fight the whole world for you!
Husband: All the the time, you keep on fighting with me!
Wife: The lovely price, you are my whole world! :)

2. Man to 2 boys: You both look good, what is your relation?
Guy: We have very far relation?
Man: How?
Guy: He is my younger brother.
Man: So how, he is very close relative..
Guy: No, there is six more brother before him!

3. You look so beautiful in your profile pic.
Girl: I am good designer.

4. Man: Wife is missing!
Officer: Are you blind. It is post office, just go to police station.
Man: Ops, sorry, I got mad due to excess happiness!

5. I never made a mistake, I think I did it once but I was wrong!

6. Man: I am not getting married:
Priest: You can not do it, there is lot of happiness written in your fate!

7. Man: How is my son in studies?
Teacher: He is great, it feels like the invention of 0 is just for him!

8. Friend: Where are you going?
Me: Just washroom to enlighten myself. It is I will not

9. Teacher: Again, you have not did your homework, tell, what punishment should I give you?
Guy: That girl has not also did it, lock us both in bathroom!